The Days are Long but the Years are Short.

I am reading this awesome book right now called the Happiness Project (I highly recommend it) and this quote really resonated with me: "The days are long but the years are short." With so much change going on in our lives right now, sometimes it's hard to hold tight to those sweet, present moments. I'm headed out to NYC for a week and couldn't be more excited to spend some serious quality time with friends and family. It will likely be one of the last times I see them before we head out to Guam for 2 years of adventure. I've been thinking so much lately about this time with family and friends and how much I really want to enjoy it. And then this quote popped up and I knew exactly what I had to do. When I'm in NYC I'll have the chance to:

• Celebrate my grandmother's 80th birthday (if you know her, pretend you don't know her age - she would kill me for publicizing it)
• Meet my high school best friend's new baby boy (all the feels for this little guy folks, what the hell is happening to me...HELP)
• Spend precious time with my Dad (this is a big one for me - we are both workaholics #success)
• Have lunch with my high school AP US History teacher and basically role model for all of my high school/college years in her garden (hello dreams coming true)
• See my NYC mama either 9 months pregnant or with a brand new child (M do you remember the times when we weren't sure if you'd even meet Mr. Right? Holy crap so many bad dates haha)

In sum  - these are amazing moments that I am so lucky to be apart of. I recognize the travel will be long and the logistics likely stressful. But these are the moments I will treasure and take with me when I leave. To really capture them - I plan to activate all of my senses. Smell the scent of my dad's home, my grandma's perfume, and for course the famous warm pee on the streets of NYC. Feel the tight hug of my Aunts, the hot and humid east coast summer air. See the bright lights, the used and worn subway cars, the masses of people as they head their ways. Taste the salty NYC bagels and the delicious pizza. Touch sweet baby boy's soft cheeks, and my friend's big baby belly. I'll capture mental pictures and take thought notes as I file all of these sweet memories in my heart and keep them close to me as we travel. This time is so important to me - I can't express how much these people I get to visit helped to shape my world and give me the love and support I needed and am so grateful for to this day. Squeeze your loved ones tight, all. :)

xoxo

- AM

Celebrate For Nice

I was lucky enough to be in this beautiful place: Nice, France winter/spring of 2009. On a long weekend trip from studying abroad in Firenze, Italia, my fellow students and I (read: American travelers who occasionally took some classes in Italy) explored this beautiful city the weekend before the Carnival festival. I'll never forget the gigantic carnival figurines that were being set-up. We watched them come to life high in the skies as we rode the giant ferris wheel in the city center. I'll never forget the magic of this great city, the beauty of its shorelines, adorable tiny blonde French children, and delicious croque-monsieur sandwiches (this was pre gluten/dairy free). My heart continues to break for everyone in our Western world, especially the French last night. Paris, France is #2 on my list of cities I love like humans (under my former boyfriend of course, NYC). When something happens to the French, I really feel it happens to us as Americans too because we fight for and believe in the same liberties and way of life. As a military spouse I won't go off on a tangent here regarding my thoughts on the American political system and the state of our international security. But rather, I'll speak from the seat of a yoga teacher here (my heart). I am sickened by the events that try to steal and threaten our celebrations as humans living in the great and free Western world. Instead of letting fear take over, I beg of you all to fight back...in celebration. This place, Nice - is such a meeting spot for celebrations. Bastille, Carnival - it's party town in the South of France people. So let's celebrate EACH and EVERY day and celebrate on for those who no longer can. One of my favorite things about being apart of the Western world is how much we celebrate everything. Independence day, Hallmark holidays, St. Patrick's day - you name it, we celebrate it. So let's celebrate on - please SMILE and be KIND to those around you. Celebrate life, celebrate love, and whatever you do, please keep on celebrating.
xoxo
- AM

All the Feels

This really awesome moment happened after 1 of my yoga classes yesterday. I always let people into my class late because really I don't care and also how frustrating is it when you hustle to get to class to then be turned away? Anyways, the student I let into class late came up to me after for a chat. I had met her the day before - she was getting back into yoga for the first time in years and I was happy to see her back at it again/good to know I didn't scare her away. She said she had something to tell me. She shared that she had finalized her divorce that day and though she felt confident in her heart it was the right thing to do, she was still was having a rough day. She thanked me for letting her into class - saying that is changed the tune of her day and she was so appreciative. I responded with thank you so much an gave her a hug (my usual). But then she said something that got me crying (naturally)- she said "no, I really want you to understand you have an impact on people. What you do - it really helps people." Cue all the feels - how lovely is this woman? Not only was I so happy to be able to help with a glimmer of happiness in her day, but it also made me feel like I had (good) fireworks going off inside of me. For the next few months, we made the choice for me to work full time at the yoga studio before we move to Guam. That was not an easy decision initially, but after much debating - it became the only natural decision and next step for me. I've felt so free ever since we made the choice - but to have this student share her sweet words with me was a culmination of everything I felt about this big shift. Interactions like with her were the EXACT reason I dove heart and soul into this adventure. It's insanely cool to be in a place (to quote my girl Gretchen Rubin from The Happiness Project) where I can say "I am lucky to be as eager for Monday mornings as I am for Friday afternoons."
xoxo
- AM

I'm Really Bad at this Guys

The other day my husband told me I was really bad a being vulnerable. You have to understand:
1. I try to be really good at everything I do.
B. I try to only do the things I'm good at and stand clear of the rest (I'm honest with myself about where my skill set lies haha)
2b. My sweet husband never tells me I'm bad at anything (besides giving directions) he's always complimenting me, so major red flag on your personal growth, Amanda.
Time to take a hard look at myself - I do hate being vulnerable. It sucks - if I could have all of believe you that nothing effects me and everything is fine all the time that would be awesome. Honestly, I do it for you. I never want someone else to be brought down by me or feel like they can't rely on me. I'm happy when I can make people happy so the opposite of that makes me sad. I also don't want to be little miss negative Nancy (sorry) all 'whoa is me' in the corner because I know how awesome my life is and how much more tough life is for so many of those in this world. I don't want to be an ungrateful boob. But I recognize life isn't all roses and rainbows. To break the news I hinted at in the last post - we are moving to Guam. Have-your-shit-together Amanda is super excited and truly feels like we've been given a gift to explore the world together the next two years. FREE of any real commitments and a chance to see places and experience cultures togethers we might never ever had the chance to otherwise in our entire lives. Vulnerable Amanda: scared shit-less. Not because of the actual move, but because of how the move puts me in all the vulnerable spots. I likely won't be able to take my day job with me: financial vulnerability. I have to rely to on my husband completely until I get up on my feet: emotional vulnerability. I have to be able to travel on a whim with his job: type-A freak out not being able to plan, vulnerability. I am finally being forced to chase my passion and do yoga full time: creative vulnerability. As you can see dear reader, this is my nightmare. Again, so pumped to travel - shade of panic over the fact that I will literally become vulnerable in every aspect of my life. And shit, it's time. I watched this awesome TED talk recently (you can check it out here: http://bit.ly/1GlL9DV) given by a woman who I really resinated with. Like me, super type-A and always wanting to have her ducks in a row at all times - she came to realize this wasn't actual living. That juicy feeling you get, that missing piece, butterflies in the stomach, heart jumping loops - that's life being LIVED. And you can't get that without being vulnerable. So let's do this - in Guam - let's LIVE life. I'll be vulnerable as all heck so likely a nervous mess for the first few weeks - but this is my chance. To really live it - to feel it - to make it happen.
xoxo :)
- AM